Every once in a while you run into someone who has mastered the art of living, someone who doesn’t just move through life waiting for a certain time or place or person to make his or her time here a life of consequence, someone who doesn’t just live on the surface but really soaks it in; the good and the bad; someone who treats life as true adventure.
I was recently treated to a visit from just such a person. This is a man who touched the lives of my deceased brother, taken far too young and my family many years ago. We were all so young then with our whole lives in front of us. So much time has passed imagine my surprise when a set of seemingly unrelated circumstances brought us together after all these years. (You know, as I grow older my belief in and awareness of serendipity increases!)
It seems Coach Harvey has written a book about his life, his adventures and some of the people who have left footprints on his heart. He is by his own description an ordinary man but clearly he is exceptional. What an honor to receive the book and find he has devoted a chapter in it about the special bond and relationship he shared with my brother during and beyond his days as quarterback for Coach Harvey’s team in high school. A part of the inscription he wrote in my book said “I truly hope you find joy and interest in reading this, my book of memories.” I did Coach, I really did.
After receiving the books, one for each of my family who are still here, we had the opportunity to chat on the phone. As most reunions go, there were promises of getting together for a visit the next time he passed through Phoenix. I of course thought it was another of those well intentioned but never realized plans.
Well, this man is full of surprises. About 4:00 o’clock on a recent sunny afternoon my mother gets a call from Coach Fred Harvey. He is in Tucson and would love to see us all and catch up. Was I surprised… um yes?
Here is a man who is 87 years old and driving from Mississippi to Prescott, Arizona to be with an old friend in a nursing home who he unfailingly visits each year. He is spry, interested and interesting with a razor sharp memory, wit and his eyes still twinkle with genuine delight! He has stopped to visit a number of people on his way. He tells us he has to be home before spring break ends because he is coaching a high school team again. After retiring several times he finds he still misses it. Over the years Fred has traveled and coached in many foreign countries and I can only imagine the number of young men and their families whose lives this man has left an impression on. He talks of maybe writing another book.
As I listen to his tales, like everyone’s life, some are sad, some are happy but at all times the one thing you hear loud and clear is an unyielding ever present passion for living and what comes next. I find myself becoming inspired to do the same. Listening to him reminds me of when I was younger and lived what they call a spontaneous life; when I was eager to veer off the beaten path just to see what might be there and if I would like it!
I have always heard the best coaches and teachers lead by example; now I know this is true. Thanks Coach Fred Harvey for your visit and your message is loud and clear…
As Nina Maddux wrote in the forward to his book and it so perfectly captures the essence of his story, the man he is and most importantly the lesson we can learn from him:
“All the emotions I experienced while reading Hell, Yes. I’d Do It All Again, inspired and challenged me to seize the moments as they come, hold on to them, learn from them and never give up.”
I could not have said it better. When we parted we each received a hearty hug and a kiss on the cheek as he said “I always tell people I care about I love them because you just might not see them again.”
So what are the lessons I gathered?
Life is sweet and too precious to waste. Isn’t there something more for you?
Write the book, climb the mountain, visit the homeland, start the business you love even if you won’t be a millionaire, work on a cruise ship, dance the tango in a foreign land, eat the cake, squeeze the grand kids too tight, tell yourself how you cute and special you are and everyone else while you’re at it.
It really is that simple, seize the moments, let go of the “shoulds”, do the “wants” and look for what’s next and you will find it!
Deborah Hayes is a CTA Life Coach and mentor to women in transition who are ready for a new phase in life. Through her unique coaching program, Get Your Year in Gear, she inspires supports and empowers women to live a life of consequence; a life without regrets that is their own unique version of the life they love. To subscribe to her FREE bi-monthly ezine and receive a complimentary 21 Day Attitude Adjustment e-course visit www.womenintransitiononline.com
